One of the blogs I've been enjoying recently is Stuff Christians Like. Jonathan Acuff has a real nice line in sanctified sarcasm that's right up my street.
Here's a taster from his post on Hand Raising Worship - The 10 Styles.
The Half & Half. This person often wants to sing with both hands raised, but they go to a conservative church and don’t want to be known as “that guy.” So instead of singing with both hands up, they hold one in the air and put one in their pocket or on the chair in front of them. It’s like half their body is saying,Here's Jon's top ten hand raising styles-
and the other half is saying,
“Nothing to see here folks, move it along please, move it along.”
Turtle image from National Geographic.
1. The Ninja
2. The Half & Half
3. The Single Hand Salute
4. The Elevator
5. The Pound Cake
6. The Tickler
7. The Double High Five (AKA The "Secret Passageway")
8. The Huge Watermelon
9. The Helicopter Rail
10. The YMCA
In the interests of full disclosure I'm pretty much a Double High Five/Secret Passageway guy, with Pound Cake tenancies if I'm receiving prayer ministry. Give me a good conference and an aisle seat and I might even do The Tickler (I've reworked that sentence several times but there just is no good way of saying it. Any sinful ideas are in the mind of the beholder).
In my old age I'd like to be like the woman who, when she lifted her hands, "always looked like she was clearing a runway for God to land".
Read the post and let me know what style you prefer. Just try not to think about this when you're looking out at the congregation as you're leading worship!